We have solved that issue by having a cat the same colour as our carpet.

Matching clothes to a moult is good too :)

...

I took this pic of kitty yesterday because she looked so damn comfortable.

Notice she is not the same colour as her lazy boy chair. I have thrown something over the back of the chair to protect it, but as there are large patches on the chair in mismatched colours from where she was using it as a scratching post it doesn't seem to matter any more. She is the same colour as the carpet, but she doesn't like to sit on the carpet too much.

People sometimes ask me if I have pictures of my kids, so I spend ages scrolling through my phone only to confess that I can't find them, but I do have lots of pictures of my cats if that is any help.

LOL...I like how you refer to it as 'her' lazy boy chair.....
Comfy kitty.

*edit: the vacuum cleaner is now toast - shame it happened first time it was used, but never mind :)

Well, it was a special one off Mr. Dyson made in wood. I think it was more a show piece.

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Ah that would be this one that I found behind the sink in the scullery then?



I told young James that it wouldn't catch on but he wouldn't listen ....

That... *blink* looks horribly like something you'd have to grunt across the carpet... whilst simultaneously performing a vigorously emphatic sink plunger motion with the handlebar which *profanity blink* ... if you time wrong - pastes your sweaty face with the contents of its open-topped dustbag.

....

Did a man invent it?

:)

High IQ...? :)

No pix showing here.

No pix showing here.

Oh.

Well considering what that might sound like without the benefit of a picture... I'll see if I can remedy it...



Is that better? :)

Thnx ..

How many work units can that thing do in a day?

Now just tell me how you can
retain staff if you don't get
them all the modern tools they
may need to do a good job for you?

Oh, such modernity. Never had one of those evil inventions.

Making an even more horrible noise than usual, I did. It ate two feet of carpet, smoked, and then caught fire. Not surprisingly... with one swift bite through the power cord, the next one, my cat killed.

I've not replaced it... the vacuum cleaner.

What's wrong with a broom, and a dustpan?

Exactly. Perfect three point landing every time :)

edit: no animals were harmed in any way during the reporting of this incident - although a latent addictive personality disorder (relating to zzztsing) may have arisen...

What's wrong with a broom, and a dustpan?

Ever tried to get animal fur out of a shaggy carpet with only a broom? Impossible.

Ever tried to get together all the feathers a moulting bird is dropping with a broom and dustpan? Also impossible.

(I've got my Mom's bird visiting, he's at the end of his moulting period and starting to sing again. Wokkel is now really interested in that yellow tennis ball. ;-))

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What's wrong with a broom, and a dustpan?

Ever tried to get animal fur out of a shaggy carpet with only a broom? Impossible.

Ever tried to get together all the feathers a moulting bird is dropping with a broom and dustpan?

I found having a sticky child around made it a lot easier. Gently rolled around the floor - very good. In fact...


Sticky children - I endorse them :)

What's wrong with a broom, and a dustpan?

Ever tried to get animal fur out of a shaggy carpet with only a broom? Impossible.

Ever tried to get together all the feathers a moulting bird is dropping with a broom and dustpan?

I found having a sticky child around made it a lot easier. Gently rolled around the floor - very good. In fact...


Sticky children - I endorse them :)

Sticky children are the main reason I could never be a primary school teacher. They have stuff leaking out of every orifice.

never be a primary school teacher. They have stuff leaking out of every orifice.

How many pores ... never mind

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But are there any loose feathers lying around the place...?

Hmmm... I thought not :)

I will trade you for a dog or three covered in tree sap.

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Pluto will always be a planet to me.

Gee, chatter here at a non-outrage time! Must be because the Pope is over here. What will the next miracle be?



Source: Catholic Memes Facebook page. I'm not Catholic, but one of my friends is. Very.

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signature

What will the next miracle be?

Me not getting some nasty infection to go with the black eye I had installed for me yesterday, is what I hope :( Selfish I know - so world peace would be a nice one to add to that.

Seriously - if you happen (by some great misfortune) to find yourself in the east end of London, and you see a large, elderly, disabled lady struggling with her crutches and her shopping bags and dropping them all over a shop floor, and you can find a way of establishing whether she has her own teeth

...from a distance people...

...(perhaps with a very long barge pole)...

and if she HAS... and has longish dark brown hair hanging from them like trapped strands of dental floss

DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES HELP HER

I know. It flies in the face of what your instincts tell you - but it's those instincts that will leave you utterly unprepared to defend yourself from a crutch handle being rammed into your eye (and again into your ribs) with the help of a frighteningly strong fist, and the scariest teeth you will have EVER seen outside of a horse's mouth - being rabidly sunk into whatever bit of you they can access :( I'm fortunate she employed them last, because all she had available at that point were the bonier parts of my head.

All I went out for was milk.

You did tell the police?

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You did tell the police?

Not initially. I just wanted to go home :( but my other half went nuts about the bites. I think he'd assumed I'd got the eye by lobbing myself at a tree or something, or from my history of walking into lampposts :/

It seems she's "very well known" to the police but has only recently arrived in our local area, and was put here, apparently, because mental health services claimed she would be "less vulnerable in a new community" :( I can imagine why...

That, in my opinion, is not caring for anyone.

@Chris

the store Manager

was utterly useless. To be fair, I think everyone went into total shock, but it happened right in front of him and he did nothing - as did the other three burly men in there, who basically - as soon as she was no longer attached to my head scarpered like at those awful running of the bulls things they have in Spain... you know that peculiar human ability to elevate our legs several degrees higher than usual in a forward direction - usually linked with wild staring eyes and expletives? Well... like that.

Annie, if she bit you, see a DR asap.

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Pluto will always be a planet to me.